This week I’ve been thinking a lot about the power of not giving a flying fuck. Which, if you think about it, is pretty intertwined with not having fear. Or maybe it’s courage: having fear and doing it anyway.
I bumped into this idea three times in totally different ways.
First: Jeff (my partner) and I were on a hike, and we ran into this older couple wearing umbrella hats. If you’ve never seen these (which I had not), I’ve done you a solid and found a picture:
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Yes, a tiny umbrella strapped to your head. Full hands-free shade, fully ridiculous-looking. They told us they also wear them in hot tubs when it’s raining so they can so they can relax without raindrops hitting their heads.
These two were absolutely delighted by their umbrella hats. No shame, no hesitation. I found it inspiring. They don’t care how they look, they don’t care what people think. They’re just here to be comfortable and do their thing. Watching them, I felt a real tenderness for the freedom that comes when you just… stop caring what others think.
Second: I’ve been watching Wednesday on Netflix. Wednesday Addams is a goth teenage detective who’s not afraid of anything: not pain, not death, not the grotesque stuff most people run from. She walks right toward what most of us run from, because she understands that everything in life is born, dies, and is reborn. She’s not afraid of this cycle; she welcomes it. And in doing so, she becomes magnetic. She doesn’t flinch and her clarity of values makes her unshakable. She acts in alignment, always.
Third: every damn day in the news. The executive branch of the U.S. government flexing its power, sometimes legally, often not, with single-minded determination, no fear of consequence, no care for dissent. Definitely not in service of the people. Terrifying in its implications. You know how I feel about this; I spend a lot of my life working against it. But the reality is: this guy is getting a lot of his plans through because he acts like he’s unstoppable. Zero fear of consequence. Single-minded focus. And it works, even if it makes my stomach turn.
Three wildly different examples (umbrella hats, a gothic teen heroine, and political overreach) all circling the same lesson: fear, or lack of it, shapes reality. What we commit to, prioritize, and act on without apology… that’s what comes alive in the world. For better or for worse.
And that’s the question for you: where are you still letting fear hold you back?
Photo by Isiah Jackman on Unsplash